So much happens in a year. I remember when I was married a year I was
like "WOW I did X,Y, and Z in the last year - and I have been married
for 52 weeks" and it was a weird thing.
Well today is a different type of anniversary, a year ago today Mom
finished growing her wings and went to live somewhere else. Not ONE
DAY has gone by where I haven't thought of her. I still wait for her
to come home and always think OMG I want to show Mom this when I get
home... And then the kick comes, the one where I remember that there
is no more showing Mom. BUT shortly after that there is the thought
that I can show her everything anytime I want to. I would have loved
to have seen her see Obama get elected, she wanted to live to see
someone other than a WASP in the White House...
I am certain she would have had words of wisdom about the economy (I
am sure part of it would have been "Joy turn down the heat and wear a
coat would you?")
She would have LOVED to know that Ashley is expecting a new baby and
much like me she would have hoped it came on its due date (my
anniversary)
She would be so excited about Cheryl's new siding (yes things like
that were always exciting to her - but the woman could find the good and excitement
in EVERYTHING, and life was just exciting for her) and somehow I think
that the guys would have been in the house 1,000,000 times - she would
have found a reason (Really it would have just been that she was
worried about them getting cold out in the winter air).
She certainly would have loved the new floors, and would have mourned
the loss of Needles with me... She had loved her as long as I had. She
would have been amazed with how BIG Tyler James has become. And amazed
that Alicia is ten and Stef will be soon too...
I feel like so much happened in 2008 that she didn't get to see but at
the same time as much as I miss her I am so glad that she has pain no
more... Those wings took weeks to grow and hurt her while they were
"budding"
Momma most beautiful I miss you a lot - I learned this year that YOU
were my smile and my confidence, but slowly I will find it again... As
you said many times through out the years, "My mother didn't raise
trash" and neither did mine. I too have wings... They are yours... But
(and totally cliche here) you are the wind beneath mine... I love
you!!!
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Dates that change our lives...
Are there dates in your life that have changed it forever?
The day you got married perhaps?
The day you found out you were pregnant?
The day you lost someone you cared about?
The day you graduated High School or college?
Well 10 years ago today my life was changed and I didn't even know it for a week! 10 years ago today my niece and dearest friend Christy had a beautiful baby girl and 7 days later she told me about her. I was devastated that at 18 my niece was now a mom... I was certain her life was ruined forever. I prayed for Alicia to disappear, to be eaten by the universe, to just go away. Christy was so proud of her little bundle and wanted to share her with me, she said "Aunty, it's important - get to know her" I took her to the movies at 13 days old. I took her to see "10 things I hate about you" because there were so many more than 10 things I hated about this, this thing that had invaded MY life... Well if you have seen the movie you know that it ends happily and so has my relationship with Alicia... A bassinet changed how I looked at her and we have been close ever since.
She has changed me, and I have helped to mold her... I want to be able to take some credit for the amazing human she is turning into... I want to feel I had a hand in it.
We have certainly had our ups and down Miss Bella and I.
~I taught her to read - her first word was life... I told her I was amazed by her that life was hard.
~She taught me to make balloon animals!
~She gave me her foot!
~I held her as they put in an IV for an emergency surgery (the docs gave ME drugs to survive this - Christy was as cool as a cucumber)
~We cried together when her father and Great grandmother died
~We were at the carnival when her Grandpa Florida died
~Did I tell you she gave me her foot?
~She threw flowers at my feet at my wedding
~We spent MANY hours throwing golf balls in the river at Richardson's (we were "playing mini golf" really we just paid and walked around throwing the balls in the river and retrieving them)
~Yup she gave me her foot!
~She saw Mimi
~She has given me more hugs than probably anyone else alive
~She has enriched my life and taught me to love in more ways than I ever knew possible.
~And yes she gave me her foot...
Today she is 10 - and 10 years ago today I was given a present, a very real present... The future, and it's one I can believe in!
Happy birthday JaBell I love you so very much and if it takes the rest of my life I will make it so you know because I don't want to have to tell you I love you more than you will ever know!
The day you got married perhaps?
The day you found out you were pregnant?
The day you lost someone you cared about?
The day you graduated High School or college?
Well 10 years ago today my life was changed and I didn't even know it for a week! 10 years ago today my niece and dearest friend Christy had a beautiful baby girl and 7 days later she told me about her. I was devastated that at 18 my niece was now a mom... I was certain her life was ruined forever. I prayed for Alicia to disappear, to be eaten by the universe, to just go away. Christy was so proud of her little bundle and wanted to share her with me, she said "Aunty, it's important - get to know her" I took her to the movies at 13 days old. I took her to see "10 things I hate about you" because there were so many more than 10 things I hated about this, this thing that had invaded MY life... Well if you have seen the movie you know that it ends happily and so has my relationship with Alicia... A bassinet changed how I looked at her and we have been close ever since.
She has changed me, and I have helped to mold her... I want to be able to take some credit for the amazing human she is turning into... I want to feel I had a hand in it.
We have certainly had our ups and down Miss Bella and I.
~I taught her to read - her first word was life... I told her I was amazed by her that life was hard.
~She taught me to make balloon animals!
~She gave me her foot!
~I held her as they put in an IV for an emergency surgery (the docs gave ME drugs to survive this - Christy was as cool as a cucumber)
~We cried together when her father and Great grandmother died
~We were at the carnival when her Grandpa Florida died
~Did I tell you she gave me her foot?
~She threw flowers at my feet at my wedding
~We spent MANY hours throwing golf balls in the river at Richardson's (we were "playing mini golf" really we just paid and walked around throwing the balls in the river and retrieving them)
~Yup she gave me her foot!
~She saw Mimi
~She has given me more hugs than probably anyone else alive
~She has enriched my life and taught me to love in more ways than I ever knew possible.
~And yes she gave me her foot...
Today she is 10 - and 10 years ago today I was given a present, a very real present... The future, and it's one I can believe in!
Happy birthday JaBell I love you so very much and if it takes the rest of my life I will make it so you know because I don't want to have to tell you I love you more than you will ever know!
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